Things I Wish I Had Known #3: It's Okay to Not Have the Answers

Being an undergraduate student can be a fun, yet very stressful time. Students and faculty start talking about graduate school before you even walk in the door as a freshman. My hope in sharing my story with you all is that you better understand that you don’t have to have your life figured out when you are 18.

When I arrived on the campus of the University of Pittsburgh in Fall 1994, two thoughts immediately entered my mind. First, this wasn’t high school anymore. I went to a large high school in Pittsburgh (Woodland Hills), but this was completely different. Sometimes, I had a 15 minute walk between buildings and only 10 minutes between class. I stayed in good shape running between classes. Second, I was not really sure what I wanted to do. I thought I wanted to work in healthcare, so I started in pre-med. At the same time, I was holding on to my athletic career and playing on the baseball team.

I made it through freshman year with a GPA somewhere in the 2.6 range. I had no desire to be a medical doctor, as my classes were not that interesting to me. I decided that I wasn’t going to be a professional baseball player, and if I ever wanted to be a good student, continuing to play baseball was not the best idea, so I stopped.

Sophomore year wasn’t much better. My GPA improved a bit, but I still had no idea what I really wanted to do and no passion for many of the classes I was taking. I also was a little lost without my sport. I decided to meet with my university advisor at the end of my sophomore year. He was late to the meeting and I picked up a brochure in speech-language pathology. I was interested so I decided to take a CSD (Communication Science Disorder) class the first semester of my junior year: Anatomy and Physiology of Speech.

You might be thinking this is where the positive twist comes, but it is not. I was in no way prepared for this class. Everyone else had taken 4-5 CSD courses before this one and knew all of the terminology. They were all friends. It took me a good 5 weeks to know what the hell anyone was talking about when they said “Cricoarytenoid.” I wanted to say “God Bless You.” Needless to say, this didn’t go well. I got a D+ in the class. But….for me, it was a positive. I was interested in the material. I liked the people. I felt at home. So I took a couple more classes in the spring semester of my junior year and did well in both classes, including Phonetics.

My senior year was pretty much all CSD. I think I took a total of 10 CSD classes that year and one gen ed class. I got an A in all CSD classes, including my retake of Anatomy. I got a C in Eastern European Civilization. But that was because I was spending all of my time on CSD courses. I started my own research project with a faculty member and I was all in!

I spent the first 3 years of undergrad life wondering what I really wanted to do and somewhat worried that I would never figure it out. I find it very odd that now students are expected to know what they want to do in high school, or even middle school. There is such great pressure to have your life figured out at a young age. I will let you in on a secret: you never fully figure it out. Life is filled with twists and turns and you never know what is around the corner. Surround yourself with the right people, and you can handle those twists and turns.

When I was in graduate school, if you would have told me that one day I would be a stuttering specialist, a department chair, and ASHA Vice President, I would not have believed it for a second. I set out to do none of that. I just wanted to help people communicate. I never picked positions or opportunities because they would help me advance my career in some way. I chose positions because I was passionate about them.

My message to you is this: Don’t run from the stress. Embrace it and allow yourself to accept that part of yourself. It’s ok and normal. Surround yourself with people who will support you. Follow your passion. Let it be your guide. When you lead with your heart, you can’t go wrong. Know that you will never have all the answers. In fact, the wiser you get, the more questions you will have. But we are all here to pursue the answers together.

Submitted by Anonymous